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Social Sciences Deliver a Strong Dose of Victory, Leaves Pharmacy Prescribed with a 6-0 Loss for their Med-iocre

 By Otaru Testimony Afigie



Where do we start? How do we tell this? The Faculty of Pharmacy have been disgracefully sent packing from the 5-a-side after their abysmal display against the Faculty of Social Sciences, despite the fact that Pharmacy needed to win by a single goal margin to progress. 



In the early stages,  Pharmacy pretended to have something to offer, as they matched the strength and tempo of the Social Science team man-for-man for four minutes at least, before the flood gates opened in the fifth minute. A beautifully taken corner was whipped into the area and Alex was there to convert.



Less than two minutes later, Dr Soft the Pharmacy goalkeeper was picking the ball from his own net after his pathetic dive failed to prevent the ball from going in. What had happened? Olaoluwa of the SOSSA team decided to try his luck from deep inside his own half and the gods of football smiled on him. 



Before the SOSSA fans could comport themselves, they were celebrating again as Marvelous scored a goal that would make his name jealous, following a sublime assist from Farmeski.



The Pharmacy players experienced a breakdown in inter-player communication, resulting in a clash of prescriptions and some unfortunate cases of 'tackling teammates' syndrome. As the rain poured down, it seemed to wash away all the enthusiasm from the Pharmacy players who were unable to do anything even make simple interceptions.



In the second period, Farmeski surging with adrenaline aggravated Pharmacy's woes by getting a fourth for his team. The Pharmacy midfield lacking, their defence missing, Dr Soft (their goalkeeper), more like Dr. Fluffy, repeatedly misdiagnosed the trajectory of SOSSA's shots, proceeding to concede a further two goals.



Pharmacy breathed a sigh of relief when Alex missed a point-blank header and then a simple tap-in after an excellent build-up by his team. 



Their relief would soon evaporate however, leaving behind a mixture of shame, disgust and acrimony as a residue after Farmeski effortlessly scored a goal from out of nowhere. His decision to simply walk away without celebrating only made matters worse. 



The less said about the sixth goal,the better. Farmeski received a cross, controlled with his chest and fired a shot which had only one destination. Into the net. The Pharmacy plan to stage a supposed comeback collapsed like a patient with hypovolemic shock as the final whistle blew at that instant. Which was mercy indeed, as it brought the onslaught to an end and saved them from further humiliation. 



This result catapults SOSSA into the knock-out stages as group D leaders with a total of 9 points out of 9, while Pharmacy are done and dusted with the competition, languishing in third place with two paltry points.

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